Softening the Overthinking Spiral
Overthinking and How to Step Out of It
Overthinking is not just about worrying. It is about getting lost in a maze of your own thoughts, searching for certainty where there really isn’t any. It is that sneaky and frustrating habit of replaying conversations, imagining worst-case scenarios, and analyzing every decision like it is life or death. While thinking things through can be useful, overthinking often leaves us feeling anxious, stuck, and disconnected from the present moment. Have you been there? It is exhausting physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Why Do We Overthink?
Overthinking is often a survival strategy, not just a bad habit. If you grew up in an environment where things felt unpredictable, where love or safety had conditions, or where mistakes were not met with grace, your brain likely learned that scanning for potential threats was necessary. Overanalyzing became a way to stay safe. If you could anticipate every outcome, maybe you could avoid pain. But instead of protecting you, overthinking often keeps you in a state of hypervigilance, making it hard to feel present, trust yourself, or rest. It may have served you once, but you do not need it in the same way anymore. It is okay to learn a different way of being. You are allowed to let this go.
The Cost of Overthinking
The more we overthink, the more we
Suffer
Feel exhausted
Second-guess ourselves
Struggle to trust our instincts
Miss out on the present because we are stuck in our heads
I recently found myself caught in an overthinking spiral that left me physically and emotionally drained. It was really awful. This was not just a mental loop. My body was tense, wired, and bracing as if something terrible was about to happen. It took time to come back to baseline. I leaned on grounding practices like yoga, deep breathing, and compassionate self-talk.
One book that has helped me shift things internally is Don’t Believe Everything You Think by Joseph Nguyen. It reminds us that our suffering often does not come from circumstances but from the thoughts we believe about them. Just because a thought shows up does not mean you have to engage with it.
Therapists are human too. Many of us come to this work through our own healing. I wanted to share some insights and practices I return to myself and often share with my clients.
How to Gently Step Out of Overthinking
Recognize the pattern
The first step is noticing when you are spiraling. Overthinking thrives in the background, so bringing awareness to it with something like, “Oh, I am overthinking again. My sweet little brain,” can create space between you and the thought. When you notice it, respond with kindness rather than frustration. Overthinking is not a flaw. It is something your brain learned to do to help you.
Interrupt the loop
Overthinking feeds on mental repetition. Break the cycle by gently shifting your focus. Stand up, stretch, take a walk, splash cold water on your face, or say something out loud. Even the smallest shift reminds you that you are not stuck.
Offer yourself reassurance
If overthinking has been your way of staying safe, stepping out of it can feel vulnerable. Remind yourself, “I can handle whatever happens,” or “I do not need to figure this out right now.” These are not just affirmations. They are reminders of your resilience.
Reality check with a trusted person
Talking through overwhelming thoughts with a friend, loved one, or therapist can help. Sometimes just saying them out loud makes them lose their intensity. A supportive person can remind you of what is true, offer perspective, or simply reassure you that you are not alone in your thoughts.
Orient yourself in the present
Overthinking pulls you into the past or future. Gently bring yourself back to now. Deep breathing, noticing sensory details around you, or engaging in movement or music can reconnect you with your body and the present moment.
Ask, is this helpful?
Not all thoughts deserve your energy. If overthinking is not leading to a solution, it is just mental noise. Give yourself permission to let it go. This is easier said than done, but practicing, even imperfectly, makes a difference.
Trust yourself
The fear behind overthinking is often, “What if I get it wrong?” The reality is, you are capable of handling whatever comes. Trust is not about knowing everything in advance. It is about taking small steps, making choices, and seeing that you can navigate life with kindness toward yourself.
Bringing it all together
Overthinking will not prevent bad things from happening. It only asks you to suffer them twice. If overanalyzing has been your brain’s way of trying to protect you, shifting out of it will take patience, kindness, and self-compassion. This is not about forcing yourself to stop thinking. It is about gently guiding yourself toward a different way of being, one where ease, clarity, and presence have more room to grow.
Next time you catch yourself spiraling, pause. Take a breath. Offer yourself a little kindness. You do not have to solve everything right now. Some things do not need solving at all. And that is okay.
In solidarity,
Natalie
